I went with Adam to the GPO to watch Benny DJ last night.
To be honest, I was a bit tired and stressed and my skin decided to break out pretty bad this week, which makes me feel pretty shit about myself. So yeah…good times are sure to be had…
As we enter the dance floor I was surrounded by a smattering of 18 year olds with not a care in the world except for capturing the perfect group pose on their camera and who could display the least faculty over their body. I looked at them with insecure disdain as I navigated the d-floor, ducking and weaving the clicks and flashes. In my mind I was praying not to end up in the background of some random chic’s photo 122 from her ‘Wasted GPO night out’ facebook collection. Especially tonight anyway.
I think to myself how much easier life flows when you have had a couple of drinks. These thoughts never seem to cross your mind after a few vodkas.
Not saying that I feel bad about myself all the time at all I go out sober. I think this negative introspection happens about once every 10 times I go out. Tonight…I just ain’t feelin’ it. In the past, it would only take about 3 drinks or so to feel better about myself. Those niggling insecurities just seem to loosen their strangle on my mind a little bit to focus on better things. Like talking to girls and meeting new people. Sometimes I think that it actually might be good to have a few drinks under your belt as it takes your mind of these grating introspective questions…
‘Do I look like shit?’
‘Should I put my hands in my pocket when I dance, that might look more co-ordinated?’
No-one asks these kinds of questions when they have had a couple of drinks.
Adam and I stand in the middle of the dancefloor and try to have a conversation about the future of Fresh by yelling at each other trying to compete with the sound system. We both start laughing at the ridiculousness of the situation and unanimously decide to leave. I am really happy to exit the GPO doors.
I think that in this situation, I wish I could have had at least 2 or 3 drinks, just to as they say ‘take the edge off’.